Michael Jackson Really Liked Drugs. And Banging Lisa Marie.

Good morning. It's Thursday, July 2, and Michael Jackson is still dead. Here is the MJ poop scoop for today.

ï TMZ is saying that MJ often used the aliases "Jack London" and "Omar Arnold" to get prescriptions. Futhermore:

The DEA, which is joining to assist the LAPD in its investigation of several doctors who prescribed drugs to Jackson, will be hunting down these names and others.

Sources tell us the prescription abuse was so egregious, one doctor would call the pharmacy and say Jackson was coming down to get Demerol. The pharmacy would then fill the prescription, leaving the patient's name blank.

Cool, that's kind of the relationship we have with Chipotle. We call and order 6 barbacoa burritos with quadruple sour cream and they're like, "Oh, hi Celebnewswire, come on down."

ï Do you have a receptacle handy that might house your upchuck? Any old container will do. Grab whatever's closest–a recycling bin, a shoebox, your own lap–because you're about to find out more than you ever wanted to know about Michael Jackson having sexual intercourse with a woman. The Daily Mail ran a piece written by MJ's longtime bro, J. Randy Taraborrelli, who snitched:

From my conversations with both Michael and Lisa [Marie Presley], I am convinced this marriage was not a sham. And, according to Lisa herself, Jackson was a wonderful lover. He was, she said, 'very hot' in bed.

For Michael, it was the first time he had experienced such chemistry with a woman, or with anyone. He and Lisa appear to have had an intense and active sex life. She told a friend that he was 'hot stuff in bed' and 'amazing' – and she should know, the friend added, because 'she's been around'.

Nevertheless, some of his habits were a little odd. 'Michael liked her to wear jewellery in bed. They were into role-playing games, although Lisa would never say who was playing what kind of role. The first time, she went to turn on the lights afterwards, and he leapt out of bed and ran into the bathroom so she wouldn't see his body. He emerged 20 minutes later, in full make-up and wearing a silk robe. Then they went at it again.

That's just the tip of the barber pole. Go read the full piece. It's as intriguing and erotic as a Jackie Collins novel, only instead of a wealthy she-executive who seduces her Brazilian chauffeur, there's scrotum bleaching.