Papa Lohan Is Displeased

We like to take the piss out of buxom firecrotch Lindsay Lohan and her hat stand lover, Samantha Ronson, but deep down we worship those crazy cha-cha chewers and harbor nothing but warm wishes. Someone who doesn't? Michael Lohan, Lindsay's Jesus-loving, press-fellating former jailbird dad. Pops told E! Online:

ìIím not happy. Ever since [Lindsay] got out of rehab and all these people came back into her life, things havenít been right.

ìPeople like Samantha Ronson donít need to be around Lindsay. She shouldnít be dragging Lindsay around nightclubs. Who was Samantha Ronson before Lindsay Lohan? She was nobody. She is using her for her own gain. All these people have inserted themselves into her life like parasites, and itís not right. Iím done with them.î

And if there's anyone who wouldn't know a dang thing about using Lindsay Lohan's fame as a springboard for any sort of attention, it's Michael Lohan. However, rumor also has it that SamRo is writing a tell-all on her life with Lindsay. A source told E!:

"Samantha is certainly telling friends she's planning to write a book. It's supposed to be about her, allegedly. But come on, you know Lindsay will be all over that book. She's the only one people want to read about."

Sounds touching! Touching yourself. It will be like Chicken Soup for the Lesbian Soul. Or maybe Lickin' Goop from the Lesbian Hole. Hi-yooooo!

Lovely lusty Lohan shows it off at MrSkin.com.