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Keira Knightley Is Dirty

Published May 7, 2007

keira knightley dirty.jpg
We love Keira Knightley and her delightful "Fuck You" attitude. She's kind of like Amy Poehler's one-legged trailer-trash character who always says, "Yeah, I farted. Jealous?" We can definitely see Keira breaking wind during an especially intense Orlando Bloom makeout scene and thinking it's the sexiest damn thing she's ever done. Plus, it would add to the heady aroma she's cultivated:

ìI donít shower enough. My natural smell is rather musky. Coco Mademoiselle is the first womenís perfume Iíve ever worn. I need something clean.î

Yes, Keira, Coco Mademoiselle may have a scent that can be described as "clean," but that doesn't mean it's a substitute for actually cleaning yourself. So, to tally up Keira's movie-star qualities: has terrible acned skin that has to be digitally fixed in her movies, smells like flowers after they've been freshly fertilized with a big mound of cow shit, resembles the skeleton hanging in your tenth-grade science class, swears more than your Grand Theft Auto addicted nephew. Why, she's the second coming of Audrey Hepburn for sure!


You know why else we love Keira? Because she's naked at MrSkin.com.

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15 Trackbacks

  1. By CelebNewsWire on June 4, 2007 at 11:49 am

    "You Know What This Movie Needs? More Stench."

    Remember when we told you that Keira Knightley rarely showers and smells like your great uncle Al after a week-long Euchre tournament at the Moose lodge? Turns out she…

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