But Will Princess Tiamii Be Stripped of Her Title?

We didn't report on this yesterday because we were so devastated, but after a full 24 hours of masticating and digesting this hideous news, we're ready to open up and let our hurt be known. Katie Price and Peter Andre are splitting. We thought these two were really going to make it. After all, their story is a classic one. English glamour model with the veneers of a prized chestnut broodmare meets frost-tipped boy bander on a reality show, sparks fly, etc. etc. According to the Daily Mail, each is blaming the other for the split, with Katie claiming "I'm devastated . . . it's not what I want" while Andre says:

"I'm not jealous of anybody until Katie's drunk. There's nobody I feel threatened by when she's sober. But if she's been drinking, I know she's capable of anything. The devil gets inside her and she's a nightmare."

Keep in mind that Peter and Jordan have sold every step of their lives together to OK! mag, from their wedding to the births of their children to the remodeling of their home, so we hope they get a tidy sum for the heart-wrenching pictorial of their breakup. One page will show the entire family posed cleverly miming playing tug-of-war in matching white chav warm-up suits that say "PEACE OUT", another will have a tender reenactment of Katie and Pete tearfully splitting up their vast self-tanner/NADS collection.