When we last left Katie Holmes, she was entertaining the idea of possibly taking a short jaunt to New York City to star in a Broadway play for a change of scenery. That obviously went over really well with husband Tom Cruise, because he sent her away for a nice spa weekend. A nice spa weekend at Scientology HQ, with manicure of bamboo under the fingernails and facials of water torture. Scoops Star:
Katie was recently secluded for three days at Gold Base, the remote, supersecret Scientology compound in Hemet, Calif., where she was put through a demanding schedule. "It included various tests, confession sessions, tons of reading and physically challenging purification processes," a Scientology insider reveals. "Tom insists that auditing and purification practices are incredibly beneficial to Scientologists at all levels." Katie's intensive Scientology training and treatments have been accelerated in recent weeks, says another source, because she wanted to go to New York City without Tom to star in a Broadway play. But Tom stepped in and put the kibosh on her plans. And now Katie's been going in for a series of intensive auditing sessions, some which have lasted for 36 hours straight – with little sleep or food."
We're not sure which part of this story is less plausible, the physically challenging purification processes or the fact that Scientology has a super-secret evil lair. Is it hidden in the side of a mountain or in the bottom of the ocean? Is it overseen by L. Ron Hubbard's reanimated brain, which hisses, "I'll get you next time, Holmes! Next time!" while stroking MAD Cat?
Don't torture yourself–see Katie Holmes naked at MrSkin.com.
