Katie Holmes Still Can't Run Fast Enough to Escape

We're a bit confused with this whole "Katie Holmes ran the New York Marathon" thing. We see pictures of her nearly every day. And she's always dressed in Chanel or some such, tweeds and heels and wide-legged pants. Never have we seen jogging shoes or anything containing spandex. But supposedly she'd been training for the race for three months. Is the Cruise compound so huge that they have a simulated marathon course on the grounds? And are the compound's restrictive walls completely impenetrable, even to the telephoto lens? But no matter, she did it. Perhaps through the miracle of L. Ron's undying love. IMDB reports:

Actress Katie Holmes wowed runners at the New York Marathon on Sunday when she joined them en route, unannounced. Wearing the number F127, a baseball cap, purple vest and black leggings, the Batman Begins star looked like any other runner on the 26.2 mile race route. But her anonymity ended when proud husband Tom Cruise - holding the couple's daughter Suri in his arms - insisted on a kiss as Holmes hit the final stretch of the marathon in Central Park. The actress completed the marathon with a final time of five hours, 29 minutes and 58 seconds. Looking as fresh as she did when she started the marathon, superfit Holmes was overheard giggling, "Here I am baby, signed, sealed, delivered, I'm yours," as she ran into her husband's arms at the finish line. Proud Cruise revealed, "She's very inspired. She trained for three months."

"Signed, sealed, delivered, I'm yours"? Do the Cruises only speak to each other in song clichés? Did Tom then break into a medley of "I Ran," "I Will Always Love You," and "Mr. Roboto"? We have a suspicion that if Katie's contract gets renewed and they remain a couple into their golden years they will be the types who only refer to each other as Mother and Father and wear matching holiday sweatshirts. Although it's also possible that by that point Katie will be so sick of being married to a cracked closet case that she'll just be the old lady in layers and layers of diamonds who always has a martini in her hand.



See Katie's pre-Tom boobs at MrSkin.com.