Kanye West Says: Books Are Lame, But Buy Mine Anyway

We should totally get into the book-writing business. It sounds so easy! On this website we have to write things every single day, but with a book you just write it once and you keep on making money from it for years to come. And if you're really smart, the writing part will be a total breeze. Just the other day we were alerted to this book called Things Better Than Boobs, and the inside is totally blank! Hahahaha! Totally genius right? Am I right? Huh? Not working for you? Try this approach: Be Kanye West. Then you can have a mostly blank page that says something like "Money buys stuff" and you'll sound deep and everyone will love you. Reuters sums up West's new book, Thank You and You're Welcome:

His book is 52 pages — some blank, others with just a few words — and offers his optimistic philosophy on life. One two-page section reads, "Life is 5% what happens and 95% how you react!" Another page reads "I hate the word hate!"

Sounds cool and inspirational and like it just might give you the motivation to put down that bag of Cool Ranch Doritos and start coming up with some sick beats that will make you rich and famous, right? Maybe not, but it is pretty impressive, given Kanye's thoughts on books:

Sometimes people write novels and they just be so wordy and so self-absorbed. I am not a fan of books. I would never want a book's autograph. I am a proud non-reader of books. I like to get information from doing stuff like actually talking to people and living real life.

This just shows how different Kanye West is from CelebNewsWire. We weren't going to tell you about this, because it's a little embarrassing, but we had an interesting encounter over our Memorial Day weekend. We were on our way to the Jewel to pick up some more Hennessey when we saw one of our favorite books walking down the street. We started to run, yelling, "Jane Eyre, Jane Eyre! I love you. You're my favorite book, can I have your autograph?" But then when Jane Eyre turned around, it was actually Wuthering Heights and we were so embarrassed. We don't really like that book, so if anyone needs a solid Wuthering Heights autograph, we might be willing to sell.

Oh, and by the way, the 500 or so words in Kanye's book? Yeah, he needed a co-author for those.