Just Another Day for You and Me in Taradise

Mocking Tara Reid is like hunting for myopic, legless, retarded albino deer. But still, we have a contractual obligation do it, so here goes nothin'.

Tara was seen leaving Dennis Rodman's Newport Beach home in the wee hours of yesterday morn, visibly pickled. She promptly slammed her car into a neighbor's vehicle, because she's Tara Reid and that is what she does. According to an eyewitness at the scene, Tara's "pupils were clearly dialated, fow what reason I don't know" (ooh! We do! We do!) and that after surveying the damage, Tara said that she "didn't want to deal with insurance," and tried to hand the hittee $700 to "forget it ever happened."
OK, A) why would anyone party with Dennis Rodman? It's 2006!, and B) why does Tara Reid have $700 cash on her? I suppose we can't blame the poor little souse for attempting to deal with the situation in such a manner. We assume it's learned behavior, and that the cut-rate plastic surgeon who sculpted her scarred plastic yams and lumpy gut similarly tried to hand her $35.28 and a used iPod Shuffle, saying, "let's just pretend this little incident never happened."

Tara is super duper naked at MrSkin.com.