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Jennifer Aniston Is Pregnant! Pregnant with Spite.

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It's been a while since we've seen one of those patented "Jennifer Aniston is sad" stories, so it comes as quite a relief to hear that she's doing the adult equivalent of sitting on her canopy bed staring at a yearbook picture of her crush while listening to Lisa Lisa and Cult Jam's "All Cried Out". According to Star, those pictures of her ex-husband Brad Pitt with his new infant twins hit her right where it hurts. In the babymaker!

As Brangelina's twins wow the world, Jennifer Aniston couldn't be happier. She's found love with John Mayer and will finally get what she's always wanted ó a child!

The 39-year-old actress feels that after all she has been through watching Brad and Angie's family grow, she'd love Brad to see photos of her holding her own baby and show him she's not the self-centered girl he had made her out to be.

"It's my turn now," she told a friend. And Jen believes the rocker is perfect daddy material.

"Jen feels so strongly that John is 'the one,' " says a source. "She knows he can handle being a dad."

Indeed, nothing will show your ex-husband that you're not self-centered quite like having a baby and plastering its photos on a magazine cover just to show him. Except sending him a copy of the magazine via courier with a halo drawn above your head in Sharpie and the words "NOT YOURS!!!!" with an arrow pointing to the baby. And then showing up and knocking on his window and cheerfully shaking the baby at him by its foot, mouthing, "you got SERVED!" and then spiking the child and doing the cabbage patch.

No spite, just boobs. Jennifer Aniston is naked at MrSkin.com.

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One Comment

  1. Mr Wonderful
    Posted August 7, 2008 at 9:03 pm | Permalink

    I think Jennifer is much hotter than Jolie.

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