We here at CelebNewsWire love Kevin Federline. He has brought much entertainment into our lives. It's refreshing to discuss a celebrity couple's eating habits and use words like "bacon double cheeseburger" and "chunky monkey dipped french fires" instead of "celery sticks" and "lemon wedges." But, seriously, dude is dumb. In practically the same breath he talks about how much he loves being a "pimp" and what a devoted husband he is. Yeah. That makes a lot of sense.
Kevin doesn't mind if people see him as a pimp (his totally classy pre-wedding garb kind of proved that) because it can only help his rap career, or give him street cred, as the kids say. He said:
If I'm gonna be a rapper, that image can't really hurt. A real pimp is a dude who's making money off bitches who sling that ass on the street. Nowadays, people will say they're a pimp just because they're suave. I'm not no pimp. I'm just Kevin. Happy husband. Happy father. I didn't pimp Britney. I found love.
Awww. Of course Kevin doesn't realize there still might be a pimp in his marraige. We think that Britney has a master plan to cultivate her husband's talents (yeah, we haven't found them yet either) so that he can bring in the cash while she stays home and watches Oprah and balloons to five or six hundred pounds. And lucky for her, Kevin will stick around if she does. Kevin doesn't want to end up like Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachay. He said:
My situation is different. I ain't gettin' no divorce. Fuck that! I don't believe in that shit. Once you get married, you're in it for the fight.
By "the fight" Kevin obviously means "the amount of time it takes me to spend all of Britney's liquid assets and brainwash another dim-witted, financially viable pop star into marrying me and accepting massive amounts of my supersperm."
You wouldn't want to divorce Britney either after seeing her at MrSkin.com.
