Chances are there’s maybe one dude reading this right now who’s thinking, “Man, I’ve just gotta know whether or not Heidi Montag really gets naked in the next issue of Playboy. She is so smoking hot and not at all the most annoying person on the planet.” Sure, that’s a big maybe, but if that one guy is out there, we’ve just got to say sorry. We don’t know yet. But what we do know is that Heidi’s Playboy pics are better art than any of that shit Picasso ever did. Dude was such a hack. Or so says Spencer Pratt, art critic. Sayeth the Pratt:
[The photos are] beautiful art. Not, like, Picasso art – real beautiful art, you know what I’m saying?
[Playboy] kind of had a vision… and we brought in Matthew Rolston, who is a very well-known, amazing photographer. So, it’s more art.
Decades from now, art museums will finally see the light and throw big ol’ turds like Guernica and The Old Guitarist right in the trash bin and replace them with giant nudes of Heidi Montag. There will also be monuments to her beauty in every town square, and America will be renamed Heidionia.
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Heidi and Spencer are part of an Avant-Garde movement to break from from the shackles of taste and discrimination left over the hopelesly outdated modernist aesthetic established at the Armory Show and replace it with a new vacant-eyed, duck-lipped, fake-tittied new standard of beauty.
And I’m the love child of Frank Sinatra about to go on a worldwide tour with the clone of Sammy Davis Junior, the ghost of Dean Martin and the revived corpse of Peter Lawford with the brain of Ed Bishop opening up.
Personally, I wouldn’t trust a word from that Pratt guy if violence were involved. When is PLAYBOY going to stop doing these wannabe celebrity centerfolds and do some real work? I mean, honestly, where the Hell do they find these people and how can we stop them?
well when you have a rat faced shriveled old prune making the decisions and all he likes are blonde bimbos that have had more plastic surgery then joan rivers you wind up with a company in the final stages of terminal cancer and you get before mentioned blonde bimbos like heidi and cockteases like olivia munn cause you have become irrelevent as a magazine and cant afford anybody else. still want to see both these broads naked tho.
I know almost nothing about her, I’ve never seen any of the reality shows she’s been on, or any interviews with her, but gotta say I wouldn’t mind seeing her naked.
I HATE NURSES!!!