Hayden Panettiere Dating Giant with Cool Name

Remember the good old days of Russia and the Cold War and glasnost? American culture was filled with stony-faced men in tall fur hats demanding things like vodka and Rocky Balboa and the destruction of democracy. This was followed by our country’s love affair with Jocko, Yahoo Serious, and all things Australian, but today, the meaty northern Eurasian makes his comeback in the form of heavyweight Ukrainian boxer Wladimir Klitschko, who was spotted canoodling with a bikini-clad Hayden Panettiere on the beach in Miami. This might seem like an odd pairing, but her type is much older and much taller men. His type is apparently Smurfettes. Notice in the pictures that Hayden called upon a little person friend to show up and hang around in an attempt to make her seem normal-sized. Nice try, half pint. Nice try.