Girl Fight! Fabio vs. George Clooney!

Have you ever seen two seven-year-old girls fight over whose Bratz doll is the whoriest? "Mine has a shorter skirt!" "Well, mine has more turquoise eye shadow!" "But mine stayed out all night in the Burger King parking lot with my Zac Efron doll. And they were drinking beer!" And then much arm flailing and hair pulling and high-pitched screeching ensues? If so then you can pretty much imagine what a shove fight between George Clooney and Fabio looks like. According to Page Six:

DON'T sit George Clooney next to former romance model Fabio. On Friday, Clooney and gal pal Sarah Larsen were having dinner at L.A. eatery Madeo next to Fabio and a group of women. All was well until one of Fabio's pals started taking pictures of her friends. According to numerous eyewitnesses, Clooney, assuming the woman was taking snaps of him, asked her to stop - prompting Fabio to explain that the shots were of his group, not Clooney, and to tell the superstar, "Stop being a diva." Clooney started arguing back, and he and Fabio then got into a shoving match. "The waiters broke it up before it got out of hand," a witness told In Touch. Clooney then paid his check and left before finishing his meal. According to another In Touch witness, Ron Marotto, "George looked annoyed when Fabio went to his table. George stood up, dropped the F-bomb and then went to push him . . . George was drinking . . . He wasn't drunk, but he certainly wasn't stone sober, either." Fabio's manager told the magazine, "George is lucky he didn't end up in the ER." Clooney's rep declined to comment to Page Six.

We imagine that a fight between Fabio and the Cloon would be pretty well matched, as each would be too frightened of messing up their manicure to go too far. But we also think that Fabio has a secret weapon. Why else would he persist with the flowing romance-novel locks if they didn't possess the ability to transform into dozens of tiny whips that could lash at an offender's face until he was bloody and unrecognizable?