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October 17, 2007 at 10:59AM

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Eva Mendes Likes Constant Nudity, Except for in the Flickers

The much-maligned Eva Longoria and her mouth full of TMI seem to have disappeared off the radar, post-wedding. But cut off one of the seven heads of the sexy-talkin', Eva-named hydra, and another sexy-talkin', Eva-named head will grow in its place, even stronger than the one preceding it. Well, maybe not stronger, but definitely less gnomish and with better taste in swimwear. According to Nudography, Eva Mendes really likes being naked; in fact, she completes mundane tasks such as pruning and weeding in the raw, saying:

“I love being naked. I do everything in the nude, even the gardening! We’re Cuban, and it’s a hot island. Why not go nude?”

However, although stripping off your garments and squatting in the dirt to yank up some ragweed that's precariously close to your girl-wiener is perfectly natural, being naked in front of a camera still gives Eva the creeps, and she says of her We Own the Night sex scene with Joaquin Phoenix:

"It’s not a natural thing on camera, so it’s always going to be a little awkward.

“It was tough. That morning I was so nervous that the director was like, ‘Why don’t you put a little vodka in your orange juice?’ So I did. It took the edge off.

"It’s weird to see myself in bed with Joaquin up on the big screen. I told my mom she has to come 15 minutes late. She wouldn’t live through that first scene - she’d have a heart attack. The poor lady would keel over in the movie theatre.”

Keeping in mind that Joaquin Phoenix is a very very recently recovering alcoholic, watch said sex scene with a critical eye and see if Joaquin's tongue has a certain urgency as it darts around Eva's luscious mouth, as if seeking out delicious pockets of Grey Goose clinging to her molars, like the ice cube-licking lady in the Disaronno ads.

All this talk of Eva naked is making you want to see Eva naked, yes? Yes. So go. Go to MrSkin.com. Go and see.

Related Topics: Eva Mendes, Joaquin Phoenix, booze, celebrity nudity, movies

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Nudity is divine. And it is comfortable and healthy for us.
Any one who is interested in nudity? You can share your experience with more people who are interested in nudism. http://nudistconnect.com

Posted by: dana | October 20, 2007 07:29 AM

Eva Mendes is a jackass. This is what she's REALLY like:

http://www.crazydaysandnights.net/2007/08/blind-item-revealed-jackass.html

Posted by: unimpressed | October 26, 2007 02:34 AM

From crazydaysandnights*net:

So Eva Mendes walks into Starbucks and says three words, and three words only. "Non fat latte." No size, no other instructions. Just those three words. When the barista asks a followup question, the actress puts her finger to her lips in a shhh motion, but says nothing. He tried again, and got the finger again. It was kind of like watching Austin Powers in front of your eyes except she wasn't actually saying anything. I guess he recognized her because he didn't ask for her name, not that she would have responded anyway.

She doesn't utter a sound or make any other noise as she pays for her latte and just ignores any and all questions or comments from the barista.

While she is waiting she positions her body in what well could be described as peacock or flamingo mode. She walked around the entire Starbucks thrusting her chest out and her head back like she owns the place. The three customers in the store started looking for hidden cameras because this was crazy as the actress just kept walking around in circles. It was like she wanted to put her very real beauty on display, but there was no one to display for. The place was practically empty and it's a very small Starbucks.

When her latte was ready, the server just raised the cup and Eva noticed it on her next pass through the store. She walked up, took the cup and then walked out of the store like she was on a runway.

As she left, one of the customers said "If I was going to do that I would at least make sure my hair didn't look like a rat's nest when I did it."

Posted by: whatevs | October 26, 2007 02:40 AM

I agree with the first comment. I am a nudist, so I do not find nudity to be shocking, erotic, or exciting or obscene. It should be legalized everywhere for people of all ages.

Posted by: David | February 29, 2008 12:51 AM