Colin Farrell is not the cocksman he was a mere year or two ago. Gone are the days of spending leisurely afternoons being fed grapes by four Eastern European supermodels while Lindsay Lohan suckled his toes and Angelina Jolie performed a lap dance. Now he can't even get 70-year-old crones to bang him.
. . . or Elle MacPherson, but that goes without saying.
The bulgy, ponytail-sporting Farrell recently filmed a movie, Ask the Dust, with 70-year-old screen legend Dame Eileen Atkins. Looking at Dame Eileen, Farrell saw not an ancient, wrinkled biddy but a ripe, available maid who was maybe one of twelve women in the world who wasn't aware of his reputation as a walking gonorrhea culture.
"I was doing a movie and three weeks before my 70th birthday, a simply stunningly gorgeous big film star aged 28 years old came into my hotel room for sex without strings," Atkins told ITV.com. "I spent two and a half hours saying no. But it was pure bliss and it made me sail through my 70th birthday without a care in the world."
Later Atkins elaborated to the Evening Standard, "It cheered me up fantastically. I said No in the end because he said, 'The reason you won't do it is because your body isn't as good as it was when you were young isn't it? That's why you're saying no. I don't care about that. I don't care.' But I'm too proud of how I looked when I was younger. My body is still the same weight, but it's all distributed in a different way!"
In similar news, Elle MacPherson is laughing (and projectile vomiting) at rumors that she and Farrell spent some quality time (pssst, that means DOING IT!) together in the Bahamas. She told ITV.com, "What? He's 28 years old and I have two kids. I haven't heard that rumour–it's interesting. Now the poor guy is thinking, `I'm being connected to that old bag'". And, well, Elle just wrote our punchline right there.
See what Colin didn't: Eileen Atkins NUDE (yes, really) at MrSkin.com.
And also see Elle MacPherson, naked, at MrSkin.com.
