Zach Braff Disguises Douchiness, Snags Barrymore

Apparently Zach Braff is on a mission to despoil lovely young actresses whom we like with his truly unique brand of scuzzy dickwaddiness. Over the weekend he was seen contaminating the otherwise pure visage of Drew Barrymore. Page Six reports:

WHEN Page Six first reported that Zach Braff was flirting with Drew Barrymore at the "SNL" after-party a few months ago, we didn't think anything would come of it – after all, Barrymore was dating Spike Jonze and Braff was dating just about everyone. But they recently reconnected and spent the weekend in East Village bliss. On Saturday, the lovebirds held hands strolling down Lafayette Street and that night made out at Beauty Bar.

And according to the Daily News:

Zach Braff – who's not a cad, according to his blog – hit the town Saturday with Drew Barrymore. The two were spotted making out at Beauty Bar on E. 14th St., sez Gawker.com.

This quote prompted us to check out Braff's website, hoping we'd get a nice diatribe defending his horrible pickup lines, but instead we got thousands upon thousands (seriously) of words filled with lame "jokes" and shameless self-promotion. Thanks, Zach! But anyhow, we thought Drew Barrymore had a bit more sense than to suck face with Zach Braff (although we had forgotten about her brief marriage to Tom Green, so we suppose it's not actually out of character). Someone needs to get this girl a copy of that Mandy Moore song right now, before he tricks her into starring in his next directorial effort, the story of an introspective aging indie-rock musician who finds love and salvation when a quirky yet adorable diner waitress refuses to fill his hash-brown order. Hilarity–and many, many songs by the Shins–ensues.