ï Courtney Love, in a bikini, weighing less than her 12-year-old daughter. That's what making out with Bruce Willis will do to a body. It happened to Lohan, now it's happening again.
ï Uma Thurman's one-piece strains against the weight of her Nordic kahooblies.
ï Owen Wilson and Kate Hudson's illicit extramarital blonde people love is not going so hot.
ï Kate's mom Goldie Hawn distracts us from her daughter's love life by erecting her nipples as if they were geriatric antennae 'neath her top.
ï Rose McGowan barred her Grindhouse costars from wearing red to its premiere so that she would be the only scarlet lady. And then she gazed into her mystical mirror to ask who was the fairest, and beat her adopted children with wire hangers.
ï I'mmmmm a Puffy Doodle Daddy, Puffy do it all the daaaaaayyyyy!
ï Catherine Zeta-Jones slowly realizing that her husband is eighty.
ï Jael from America's Next Top Model has slurred her way into our hearts and out of her clothes (NSFW)!
ï Paris Hilton swings open the doors to her Valtrex-tinged mantrap and waves Desperate Housewives bit player Josh Henderson past the velvet rope.
ï Cruznett!
ï Gyllenspoon!
