ï Dennis Rodman says his affair with Madonna was "just alright", not "on a level", and "not all that". Then dropped his Most Hype Sayings of 1992 phrasebook in the toilet, sparing us any references to ". . . and a bag of chips", or Arsenio-style barking.
ï How did B-lister Jared Leto land himself an Ol$en? By packing some excessive toolage, of course. Big dongs. The ladies do seem to enjoy them.
ï Listen, we are slovenly Midwestern crapbags who are ignorant in the sparkly ways of you fancy coastal dwellers, so we don't know who the f this "Fabian Basabe" is. But we do know three things: he's a funny man, a gay man, and a racist man.
ï Whooops, Mariah "The Glitterfly" Carey's clothes fell off! There must be pictures. Where are the damn pictures?
ï Ryan Seacrest would like FOX to give him a raise. Highlights and tan-in-a-can are expensive
ï Tiffani Thiessen gets married! Congrats! Wait, wait, wait. We remember Tiffani-Amber Thiessen from 90210. Who the hell is this "Tiffani Thiessen" person?
ï Pssst! Angelina still likes sex! PASS IT ON.
