ï Demikini. Bidemi? Moorekini. (Drunken Stepfather)
ï Amy Winehouse plans to heal from her husband's arrest by backpacking through India. Yeah, there is absolutely nothing funny about that sentence. Nothing mockable there, no siree. (Socialite's Life)
ï Tom Cruise sure can cut a rug, boy! Look at 'im jitterbug! He's doin' the Lindy Hop! Go, Tom! (Cityrag)
ï Ladies and gentleman, the greatest film ever made: Major Movie Star, with Jessica Simpson. It's like Glitter meets Private Benjamin meets a gigantic BM. (Derek Hail)
ï A lady beat up John Stamos on an airplane. Which was well-deserved; he had a hand in "Kokomo". (IMDb/WENN)
ï Paris rubbing her person on a pole. Such is her wont. (Egotastic!)
ï Lindsay Lohan is back to hanging out with her former element. The bad element. The lesbian element. No, wait, that's the good element. (Yeeeah!)
ï Hey, look, it's a bunch of Victoria's Secret chippies dressed up like the Pink Ladies. (I Don't Like You In That Way)
ï Brad and Angelina buy a man-made island in the shape of Ethiopia. Man-made? How gauche, that's like the cubic zirconia of islands. That said, we'll take one in the shape of a middle finger flipping off France. Yeah, buddy! USA! USA! USA! (CelebWarship)
