ï K-Fed and Britney want to launch a non-false tabloid Magazine of Truth that doesn't tell any lies or nasty rumors or fun stuff about celebrities. Sorry to piss in your lemonade, but that already exists. It's called People.
ï Jessica Simpson's mother does not agree with Papa Joe's willingness to pimp her out. Jessica responds by donning a semi-sheer dress. Nations rejoice, war and poverty and crime end.
ï Heath Ledger: what a joker.
ï Most actresses like to don an expensive, tasteful, and stunning designer gown to their post-wedding reception. Pam Anderson wears a skipper hat, a $12.99 bikini from Fashion Bug, and naked nipples.
ï In some circles, Tom Cruise's crotch is known as The Punisher. Poor Katie Holmes has certainly suffered enough as a result of it.
ï And is Tom about to ensnare K-Hole as his legal baby-baking concubine? If oversized planters and outdoor chandeliers are any indication of a Scientological spirit-uniting ceremony (and they certainly should be), then yes.
ï What's more entertaining than a Mel Gibson mugshot? Pictures of Mel Gibson, well into his cups, manhandling strange women mere hours before said mugshot.
ï Would you like to see Lindsay Lohan's box? Oh, wait, we meant "Lindsay Lohan boxing". So sorry.
ï Speaking of Lohan, and nipples, and transparent apparel: Lindsay aped Jessica and ponied up some vague nip. Or did Jessica ape Lindsay? No matter–we're all winners here.
