ï Kirsten Dunst has a stalker. Is it an orthodontist looking for work? Zing-a-zing-zonggg!!!! (The Superficial)
ï Elisha Cuthbert's hockey dude ex calls her "sloppy seconds". Do sloppy seconds bounce on ice? (Yeeeah!)
ï Jessica Alba's boobs like calamari! Wait, we mean Campari. (F-listed)
ï Helen Mirren goes snorkeling in a tankini. It's your move, Dame Judi. (Drunken Stepfather)
ï Twilight vampire Ashley Greene just about gives you something to suck on (hint: A TIT!!!!!). (Thighs Wide Shut)
ï Eva Longoria is a smoker on the DL. Bet you anything those are Benson & Hedges 110s. (Celebitchy)
ï So Kate Moss and her unfrozen caveman boyfriend WEREN'T attacked by rogue Christmas ornaments after all. Cocaine is a hell of a drug. (The Superficial)
ï Lindsay Lohan got kicked off Facebook. That's what YOU get for not playing your Word Twist move, bitch. (Holy Moly)
ï Scout (dun DUN dun DUN) you'll be a woooomaaaaaann SOON. (Daily Stab)
ï Kristen Stewart will play Joan Jett in the new Runaways biopic. Will she be licking some ch-ch-ch-ch-cherry bombs? (Anything Hollywood)
