CelebNewsWire Being Sent to Nice Family with a Farm for a Week

We at CelebNewsWire are committed to excellence, but even award-winning journalists like ourselves need a damn break once in a while. So after today, we'll be headed to a fat farm in Goshen, Indiana (damn those KFC Famous Bowls) for some much-needed R&R, but we'll be back on December 28th. In the meantime, please visit one of our esteemed colleages listed at right for all your holiday celebrity gossip needs, as they'll most likely be updating. Except for Drunken Stepfather–he's Canadian and we hear those savages have never learned about the magic of the birth of Christ.