Catherine Zeta-Jones: A Head Full of Fish Eggs

The gossip world is generally pretty lacking in the Catherine Zeta-Jones category, mostly because she's really, really boring and seems like the type of shrew who would threaten to have your children kidnapped and tortured (or at least have you banned from the Ivy, which could be just as bad in Hollywood) if you even imply anything negative about her. One day, after we finish our years-long, in-depth investigation into CZJ's true age (she claims she's 37, but we're placing her actual age at somewhere around 44), CZJ will be on the cover of every weekly tabloid and we will have to hire a full-time maid to polish our Pulitzer. But until then, we'll have to talk about how she washes her hair with fish eggs.

London's Daily Mail reports of Cath's hair-care regime:

While most of us have to make do with a handful of fragrant soapy foam, the Welsh actress smears on truffles and caviar.

At £200 a time, just for the fish eggs, looking good does not come cheap.

But she credits the gourmet delights for giving her long brown tresses an unbeatable shine.

The Beluga caviar is apparently flown in from Iran five days ahead of her treatments at a beauty salon in South Kensington.

"Catherine discovered the caviar treatment last summer and was astounded by the difference it made to her hair," said a source.

"She has an incredibly rich and vibrant natural hair colour but the creamy, almost oily nature of caviar really brings this out, making the colour even richer and making it so much more glossy.

"The eggs are packed with omega-3 fatty acids necessary for the formation of structural proteins. It is these proteins that repair dry and damaged hair and smooth over any split ends."

The two-hour pampering treatment at the celebrity salon, Hari's, also includes a complimentary glass of champagne and caviar canapÈs to nibble on.

Miss Zeta-Jones's hair is washed with a truffle-based shampoo, then smeared with the caviar, which is combed through and left to set.

The sturgeon roe are liquidised prior to use, which is said to remove any odour.

This bizarre beauty treatment sheds a little bit of light on one of our favorite all-time stories, "Pee-pee on Daddy's Back" featuring Michael Douglas and his five-year-old son. In the Douglas/Zeta-Jones family anything from nature can be used to aid the beautification process. Stinky fish eggs are smeared into one's hair, cow manure is used to remove toenail polish, and toddler pee-pee is used to moisturize hard-to-reach back skin.

Catherine is not covered in fish eggs--or clothes--at MrSkin.com.