We’ve been really into the idea lately that we’d soon see the following headline: “Madonna Marries Jesus.” But it seems that won’t be happening anytime soon. Not because Madonna just went through a divorce or because she’s not truly in love with Jesus Luz or anything like that. Nope. It’s because soon he’s going to be over the hill and she’s going to have to go fishing for new meat at Hot Topic. But it’s not just Jesus. She even told Ryan Seacrest that he’s too old for her. She told Seacrest on his radio show (via Radar):
“Younger people are more adventurous. Have you met many guys my age?” she said. “They’re usually grumpy and fat and balding.”
So how young is too young?
“As long as they’re old enough to dress themselves, they’re good enough,” she told Seacrest.
Great. Madonna’s going to be dating Miley Cyrus’s little brother within the year. We can’t wait for the crazy trial, the fleeing to France, the years of exile, the Oscar no-shows, the eventual arrest in Switzerland . . . oh wait.
The young’uns like the Twitters, so if you want Madonna to notice you, follow us.
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This coming from a woman with a shriveled up cooze.