Britney Spears Is Just Like Us! Passed Out Drunk on NYE!

We thought that 2007 would offer a reprieve from the constant barrage of Britney Spears antics and serve up a new dish for the gossip culinarians. Surely Rhianna or Lily Allen or even Charo is capable of slapping on a sparkly mini dress and stepping up to the beaver-flashing plate. But, alas, it's back to gossip as usual, with Britney either falling asleep or passing out drunk (depending on whom you believe) on New Year's Eve. We're sorry we have no poon to offer you on this, the first official gossip day of the new year, but that will just make Britney's plans for February (turn Hyde into nudist club with 24-hour webcam surveillance) that much more special.

New York Post reports the tale of a Britney soused on a combination of pineapple rum cocktails and champagne:

"She had a little too much to drink," a Pure source told the Review Journal. "She was assisted out, but she was not carried."

But witnesses said Spears was talking with one of her male dancers on a tented cabana bed when she said she wanted to leave, stood up and "she went into a dead faint and just fell right to the floor," a source said.

The source said the group pulled her onto the bed and called security to "get her out as quickly as possible."

"It appeared as if she was being dragged as she wasn't walking under her own speed," one eyewitness was quoted as saying on Perez Hilton's Web site.

One woman in Spears' entourage yelled, "Make sure nobody gets any photos. No photos anywhere."

But in a conflicting AP story, Brit's rep portrays her as a gee-golly good girl who was just plum tuckered out from staying up past her 9:30 bedtime:

"By about one o'clock, she was just done, so we took her out," Spears' manager, Larry Rudolph, told The Associated Press Monday. "She was not drunk. She was just tired and falling asleep."

Rudolph denied reports circulating on gossip Web sites that Spears, 25, collapsed shortly after midnight and was carried out by bodyguards. The star was hired to host the festivities at Ceasars Palace's PURE nightclub.

Rudolph said Spears walked out of the club and did not seek medical attention.

"There is nothing out of the ordinary here," he said.

We're definitely more inclined to believe the boozed-up Britney story, especially when accompanied by these New York Daily News pics, but there is one factor making the sleepy Spears story plausible: Brit really was exhausted, but not from working too hard on that album we will most likely never ever hear or from playing hide the binky with Sean and J.J. Girl's pooped from carrying around that janky ass weave all day. Ho ho! Yeah, we went there. Booyah! And other such things that people say after they have made a totally predictable and not at all funny lame joke.

You know the drill: Look at sexy pictures of Britney at MrSkin.com.