Like Richard Pryor circa 1981, Britney Spears is Bustin' Loose!!! Yesterday afternoon, she was relieved of her mental hospital duties and released onto an unsuspecting public. TMZ reported:
TMZ has learned UCLA doctors determined Britney did not pose the legal danger to herself or to others, such that they could continue to hold her against her will. As a result, she was released today and we're told she's already back home.
And OK! magazine has a timeline of her first hours out, which includes such riveting Britney avocations as hanging around with/being chased by paparazzi, driving erratically, speaking in a fake Cockney accent, and checking into hotels. Oh, and flashing some reddish underdrawers in an upskirt fashion, as is her usual wont. Listen, I'm going to break the editorial "we" for a moment here, if that's OK with you guys. So this morning I sat down at the computer and read about today's goings-on and then said to myself, "Well, I guess I'm going to have to tackle Britney, eh?" Then it struck me: TACKLE BRITNEY. That's a terrific idea. That's what she needs. I will go to Los Angeles. I will stand outside of the Beverly Hills Hotel. When Britney lopes out, I will take advantage of her scrounging around the bottom of a box of Fiddle Faddle and I will tase the shit of of Adnan Ghalib, tackle Britney to the ground, smoosh a bunch of ground-up lithium and Lamictal into her foodhole, wash her face, put some pants on her and hand her a tampon. And then spike her. I win!
Britney shows it off at MrSkin.com.
