Britney and Kevin: Horny for the Phoney

Have you, like us, stayed up nights wondering why we saw a roughly 73% decrease in the volume of Britney Spears pictures in recent months? Turns out it's because instead of going on 'buckies runs twelve times a day, she's been staying up nights rubbing her phone on her cooter. That is what phone sex means, right? Star magazine reports that Brit's been reaching out and touching Kevin Federline via AT&T:

There's no trouble with Britney Spears's phone connection!

Earlier this week, the pop star met her ex-husband Kevin Federline in court, where Britney was granted "expanded" visitation rights of their children. But their interaction hasn't been limited to court appearances — Britney and Kevin are in regular contact. In fact, they've been having weekly steamy phone sex sessions.

Recently, when Britney was having a sleepless night, she decided to call Kevin at nearly 2 a.m. While they initially chatted about their boys — Preston, 2, and Jayden, 20 months — the conversation shifted. And as Britney hoped, Kevin knew exactly how to tire her out — with hours of erotic talk!

"They have phone sex often — at least once a week," an insider tells Star. "The one thing those two have in common is their need for sex, and after they get going, there are no holds barred."

Exactly how many steps does it take to get from "chatting about their boys" to phone sex? Was there some sort of logical transition there? Or does Britney have a pacifier fetish? You know what, scrap those questions; we don't want to know. We're just going to ignore this story and pretend that Brit and Kev still want to rip each other's bowels out with their teeth. Yeah, that's less disturbing.


Britney sexes it up at MrSkin.com.