Author Archives: Inspector S. (CNW Admin)
CNW Junk Drawer: Nothing Tastes as Good as Visible Vertebrae Feel
Naked Hayden Panettiere pretends to fellate a gun, then gets a face full of liquid. Just like your mom every Wednesday haaaaaay! (The Blemish)
Miley Cyrus’s tour bus entourage involved in crash. One person (not Miley) was killed. Hey that’s not funny. (PopEater)
But you know what IS funny? 16-year-old Miley dressing up like a hooker for [...]
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Tagged Dakota Fanning, Hayden Panettiere, James Van Der Beek, Kate Moss, Kristen Stewart, Miley Cyrus, movies, Oprah Winfrey, television
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I Don’t Think You’re Ready for This Pirelli: 2010 Naked Lady/Tire Calendar
Michelin uses a jolly character seemingly constructed of coiled feces, and Goodyear has a big fat blimp. Tire advertising sucks except for Pirelli, whose entire sales model is based on elitism and naked supermodels. Which makes perfect sense, because when we think of rubber spheres bolted to your vehicle, we think of snobbery and the [...]
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Tagged celebrity nudity, Daisy Lowe, Georgina Stoljiljkovic, Marloes Horst, Miranda Kerr, models, Pirelli, Rosie Huntington-Whitely
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Scratch and Sniff
It’s been two days since Megan Fox did anything and we’re getting the DTs. Luckily, a bunch of outtakes from her New York Times photo shoot leaked and look! She’s wearing a little ice skating uniform! Awww. It looks just like Ice Castles, if Lexie looked like a porn star instead of Lynn-Holly Johnson, and [...]
Keeley Hazell Saves Animals with Breasts
PETA is probably the most reviled group of capital letters outside of NAMBLA. They do stuff that makes the most hardcore of animal activists ashamed. And the worst thing they’ve ever done is create that “I’d rather go naked than wear fur” ad campaign because none of the women are actually naked in it! I [...]
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Tagged advertisements, celebrity nudity, Keeley Hazell, PETA
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The Jug Is Leaking
Last month, Amy Winehouse debuted her new breast implants by puffing out her shiny new chest and strutting around on the street like she was a male quail showing off her fine plumage to a hen. But it looks like even this improvement has literally blown up in her face because her fake boob is [...]
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Tagged ailing celebs, Amy Winehouse, boobs, plastic surgery rumors
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Godspeed, Nicole Richie
Nicole Richie was in court earlier this week, trying to get a restraining order against two paparazzi who chased her car. But she’s got bigger problems now. US Weekly reports:
Nicole Richie has checked herself into a Los Angeles hospital.
A rep for the star tells Usmagazine.com, “Nicole has checked into Cedars-Sinai where she is being treated [...]
Shove It!
It’s been kind of nice having Paris Hilton out of the gossip papers lately. Quiet. Calm. Less itchy and weepy around the gentials. But we’ve sort of missed her and her particular brand of dipshittiness, so we’re opening up our arms and thighs and happily accepting her back into our lives. TMZ reports:
Paris Hilton and [...]
Cram It, RPattz! Johnny Depp Owns Your Sexiness
Robert Pattinson has been stripped of his crown, like Vanessa Williams and Carrie Prejean before him. Yesterday we reported that RPattz landed People’s Sexiest Man Alive title, but it turns out that we were just being toyed with. People released the real cover today, and it’s Johnny Depp again. Dude was the sexiest in 2003 [...]
CNW Junk Drawer: Goose Egg
Rihanna has a big lump on her head. So she either went back to Chris “Doo Doo” Brown or she’s growing horns. The latter is more believable. (Gone Hollywood)
Victoria’s Secret model Adriana Lima gives birth to baby girl; is probably not a virgin anymore. (PopEater)
Victoria’s Secret model Shannan Click naked. Totally, truly, NSFW naked naked. [...]
Lilo and Greasy Hit the John for Fun
This morning we woke up and felt like something was missing in our lives. Something large and clammy and teeming with riches. Then we sparked up the old computer and lo and behold, a big fat pouty meatball named Brandon Davis was back in our lives! X17 has pictures and a video of Greasy Bear [...]