You Make Ashlee Want to La La-ose Her Top

Once known as the homely little lip synching sister with the Avril Lavigne armwarmers, Ashlee Simpson filled up the latter half of 2006 by buying herself a brand-new shiny face and using it to emerge, victorious, from the pneumatic shadow of her sister Jessica. The rhinoplastic groundwork has been laid, and Ashlee is ready to burst forth into 2007 a fully-realized being, not a pale imitation of Jessica. Bursting forth literally. From her bikini top. After the jump.

This is kind of like that really pretty cheerleader in your high school who wore her skirts short, but not too short, and her tops low-cut, but not quite enough to show even a centimeter of cleave. She was sweet and bubbly and read to the blind on her days off, but would turn you down for a date every time, claiming she had Bible study. Then her sister showed up as a freshman and everyone was like, "You're Mindy's sister? No, for real? Seriously? You're Mindy's sister? And after a few months she started wearing shirts that said "I go from 0 to Bitch in 5 seconds" and smoking Benson and Hedges 110s. And getting pregnant. That girl, that mythical sister of Mindy, is Ashlee Simpson. Oh sure, she's asserting her independence and womanhood with this slip of nip–something Jessica has never done–but she's a mere bottle of Wild Vines and a bong hit away from Britney territory. Welcome to the new year.

See the rest of Ashlee's indiscretion at Egotastic!

Maybe Ashlee's newfound skin-happiness will land her on MrSkin.com this year. In the meantime, ogle Jessica.