There may be a few people left in the world who havenít been won over by Angelina Jolieís sexy, sexy ways and desire to single-handedly save the whole freaking world and still think of her as a home-wrecking hussy who broke up our golden couple and ruined our faith in marriage. But what would those people do if we told them Angelina personally reached into the cold, sharp jaws of death and pulled out her new daughter, Zahara? When was the last time you did that, bigshot?
Before being heroically rescued by Jolie, Zahara was in an African orphanage suffering from salmonella, dehydration, and malnutrition. A doctor who treated the infant in New York said, "Children with those conditions living in orphanages in developing nations can die quickly without the proper medical interventions. That would have been Zahara's fate had she not been adopted by Angelina and brought to the US for medical care.î This Angelina just seems more and more perfect by the day. Some enterprising reporter needs to do an in-depth exposÈ and find out that she secretly eats impoverished American orphans while saving their foreign counterparts. Or that sheís not human at all, but some sort of Weird Science-type superhuman sex robot. Because right now sheís making the rest of us look like total selfish, non-sexy losers. And we donít like the truth, dammit.
But if Angelina canít be brought down a peg, at least her ìheís not my boyfriendî boyfriend can be proven to have flaws. An anonymous reporter told Page Six that Brad Pitt ìhas pockmarks the size of the La Brea Tar Pits and his teeth are yellow and cigarette-stained." Ha ha, take that Angelina. Youíre man candy needs a dentist and a derm. Oh wait. She was married to Billy Bob Thornton. She doesnít care. Damn Angelina and her perfection!
Angelina's perfect (and naked!) body at MrSkin.com.
