Step right up, folks, and witness CelebNewsWire's Celebrity House of Freaks, featuring all manner of abnormalities from lands far and wide. Thrill to the sight of Chyna and her miniature penis. Oooh and aaah over Kate Bosworth's sixty-pound frame--not one ounce of body fat on that one, folks. But first, marvel at our very special exhibit--Paris Hilton's ass goiter.

Las Vegas hot spot Tao turned a ripe and ready-for-extinction one year old this weekend, and Paris Hilton celebrated much like your uncle Morty celebrates Thanksgiving-day football--by going pantsless.





Yes, we've seen it before, but never has Paris made viewing her curiously globular chair cheeks quite so easy. Or so perplexing. How does she maintain such a robust rump while keeping the rest of her frame so svelte? Do heiresses have access to special junk food that we minions are unaware of? Ring Dings and Oatmeal Cream Pies that altogether bypass arms and thighs and stomachs and only add bulk to the ass? Or does Paris have a very special relationship with a plastic surgeon who specializes in keeping his clients a size two by shaving off any body fat and using it to pad the derriere? If that's the case, by the time Paris reaches old age--you know, like thirty-one--her butt will be about the size of Elizabeth Taylor.

To put a face to that ass, head on over to Mollygood.

See more of Paris's parts at MrSkin.com.