Poor celebrities. They can't even make a trip to the waxer without someone being a stool pigeon and singing to the press. Scarlett Johansson is now the victim of a loose-lipped waxer who says that the star was terrified while recently getting her first Brazilian. Unlike, say, hooting about your deep love of having your vagina hair torn out by the roots at any given opportunity. Like certain other actresses we can think of.

Looks like someone at New York's Oasis Day Spa is gonna get shitcanned . . . a "source" at the spa claims that Scarlett Johansson recently dropped by for her first Brazilian, which is weird, since that crap went out with trucker hats and Britney's abs. The mysterious source called Scarlett "a nervous wreck", and told the New York Post that

"The waxing crew couldn't stop admiring her body."

Yes, indeed, nothing can stop the pneumatic juggernaut of Scarlett's sexuality from barrelling through even the most mundane aspects of everyday life. Not only has she been named "The Sexiest Woman Who Ever Lived in All Centuries Combined Since the Beginning of Time" by several men's magazines, the poor dear can't even whip off her pants for a routine bikini wax without reducing the normally staid, seen-it-all aestheticians to blubbering bags of lust. Damn you and your soft yet firm and naturally buoyant breasts, Scarlett Johansson. We'll see them in hell.


In hell.


ScarJo teases at MrSkin.com.