You thought you had it so good living next door to that old hippie dude who grows weed in his basement and is really friendly and likes to bake up a huge batch of pot brownies every week and share them with the whole neighborhood. But if you were Scarlett Johansson's neighbor, you might wake up in the middle of the night to find her drunkenly wandering around your kitchen searching for munchies. We'll wait here while you consult with your real estate agent.

We'd like to introduce you to the newest baby in the celebrity gossip playpen, Star Pulse. Slightly more reliable than News of the World and with infinitely better spellcheck monkeys than FemaleFirst, it might just be our new favorite source. And, really, who cares if their stories have little to no credibility if they entertain us? They fail to tell us to whom Scarlett gabbed about her inadvertent breaking and entering, but this is what she allegedly said:

I was coming home, it was very late, mind you, it was like four in the morning. Maybe I'd had like one too many champagne cocktails, or whatever... But I got home, of course I wasn't driving, and I opened my door and it wasn't my kitchen! It was somebody else's kitchen and I left and I realized my key opens up somebody else's door in my building. It like slides right in and opens it up!

I slammed the door shut as quickly as I could and I ran to the stairs because I didn't want them to think, "Who the hell was that?" It was a disaster! Then I thought maybe I should go back and see if they had a can of Coke or something... I just got back from Venice (from the Venice Film Festival), so I don't have any groceries!

We suggest that when you do snag that sweet flat next to ScarJo you keep your fridge properly stocked with everything a drunken celeb may desire in the middle of the night (and Scarlett is healthy and curvy and sexy and looks like she actually knows what a cheeseburger tastes like, so celery sticks and Slim Fast aren't gonna cut it). We also suggest that when you yourself come home drunk and "accidentally" try your own key in Scarlett's door you make sure that she's shooting a movie on location or otherwise removed from the premises before you go investigating the contents of her underwear drawer.

Start your Scarlett investigations at MrSkin.com.