When we hear a story about a barefoot Owen Wilson trying to outrun a security guard in a grocery store, we see images of Benny Hill dressed as a bobby wagging his nightstick as Owen takes a wily turn down the vitamin aisle. Owen, of course, is bedecked in a pink polka-dot bikini. But that's not that unusual, actually.

Owen and his somewhat less lovable and more cantankerous brother, Luke, were perusing the Hemp Flakes and carob-dipped, wheat-free spelt donuts at a Whole Foods in Austin, Texas, when The Man tried to reign in Owen's wild free spirit. The San Francisco Chronicle reports:

The 37-year-old left his shoes at home and tried to sneak past the store's security guard bare-footed.

A sources tells In Touch magazine, "Owen noticed the security guard looking at his bare feet, so he ran up and down the aisle trying to evade him.

"The officer managed to track him down and escort him out of the store."

Wilson was able to continue his shopping when a fan lent him a pair of flip-flops to wear.

What a drag, man. See, Owen's mistake was his shopping partner, not his lack of footwear. He should have brought Matthew McConaughey on his munchies run. Matthew would've taken the relaxed apparel one step further and sauntered into the store buck naked, with only a bongo hiding his dangly bits. And when the security guard went after the more severely unclad of the pair, he would have been charmed into submission by Matthew's dimpled smile and "It's all cool, man" attitude and Owen would have been left to barefootedly browse the selves in peace.