• Kelly Osbourne thinks Paris Hilton inspires parents to dress their children like hookers. Would she rather the children of the world take fashion cues from her?




• Is Liz Hurley all knocked up again? Does anyone care?


• Nicky Hilton calls Mischa Barton a "fat pig". Huh. Maybe she meant "stuck pig"?


• Remember those Lisa Loeb thong shots we showed you yesterday? Of course you do. Well, now you can see those pictures move! It's called "the talkies", which translates to "motile ass".


• Jodie "Stephanie Tanner" Sweetin was a meth head, but she's since Cut! It! Out!


• Oh, speaking of thongs, flash leads to a see-through dress in Alyssa Milanoland.


• Egotastic!'s got the poop scoop on what's really going down betwixt Sienna Miller and Darth Vader. It's considerably less sexy than previously thought.


• Tyra Banks rocks the pit stubble. Fierce!!!


• Quote of the year: "If you're going to be raped in a movie, it may as well be Vincent Cassel." Oh, Jennifer Aniston, you are so terribly high-larious.


• Oh yeah, Oscar nominees.


• Tom Cruise's next potential film project will be a "contemporary romance". We have a good idea for a romantic film! Boy divorces girl, elders at boy's cult pay new girl to perpetrate like she's dating boy, boy jumps on furniture, cult elders impregnate girl with mythical animal-human hybrid, and . . . aw, never mind. Nobody would buy it.