You may think your twenty-first birthday was bad, but after the barf was mopped up and the couch cushions were flipped over, the only real lasting effects were the derision of your loved ones and a case of HPV. Kelly Osbourne nearly had to pay $100,000 worth of damages, thanks to--you know him! You love him! Allll together now--Stamos Nachos!

We've already sung the sad dirge of the Jolly Greek Giant and his Ho-Ho-Ho wrecking the Hard Rock Hotel in Vegas, so we won't bore you with the details again; however, a picture is worth a whole shit-ton of these thingies you're reading, so how's about some pictures of the aftermath? This is what happens when sexy pillowfights go terrible wrong, champs.

This was, indeed, Kelly Osbourne's sweet 21st, and she's none too pleased about the way things turned out. Every bad party must have a scapegoat, though, so Kelly's dunking her tortilla chips of bitterness into the cheesiness that is Stamos and his spicy Nachos. She complained:

"Paris's stupid boyfriend ruined my 21st birthday. He trashed a hotel room, causing £60,000 worth of damage, and the hotel had to be evacuated. It's so unfair. The manager tried to make me pay for it, but I was having none of it. I said no bloody way because I didn't do it. Stavros caused the damage, so he can pay. He has enough money - he's a millionaire with too much spare cash. He's a rich kid and they don't appreciate anything because they grow up with it all. I find it really annoying."

Shhhh. Listen . . . that's the sound of millions of pots and kettles all over the world simultaneously exploding from sheer blackness.

No pics of Kelly Osbourne for you, mister! Go look at Paris instead at MrSkin.com.