We know that you’ve spent many restless nights thinking about Charlize Theron getting on her knees and kissing the ass of a fellow actress. But we’re guessing that in those fantasies the other actress was never, not once, Shirley MacLaine.

On Tuesday night both actresses were being honored at the Premiere Icon party when Theron decided that the best way to show her admiration for her colleague was to drop to her knees and literally kiss MacLaine’s withered old ass. Afterward Theron seemed a bit embarrassed by the incident and blamed it on the drugs. "It was a combination of my painkillers and the fact that everybody was paying tribute to this incredible woman, this incredible actress, so I had to go to the physical aspect of kissing her ass." We know that Charlize was only taking painkillers to deal with a neck injury she suffered on the set of Aeon Flux, but we’re seeing great things in her future if she continues on this path. A little lipstick lesbian exploration with Marcia Cross. (Wait, we meant someone else. Because Marcia Cross has totally proven that she’s straight. We forgot.) A little coked-up three-way with Kate Moss and Sadie Frost. Then straight to a weeklong heroin binge with Courtney Love. Finally Charlize Theron will be interesting. And Shirley MacLaine is definitely encouraging this sort of behavior. She said, "I've gotta get to know her . . . I should get drunk with her." Well, Shirley is not exactly the partner we would have chosen (that lesbo action with Penélope Cruz in Head in the Clouds definitely fits our fantasies better) but when a demure and classy Charlize walking around on Stuart Townsend’s arm is the alternative, we’ll take a drunken Charlize “getting to know” Shirley MacLaine any day.

Charlize, Charlize, Charlize at MrSkin.com.

And Shirley too.