Mariah Carey is not a diva. You got that, world? So please stop calling her one. And if you happen to see her being carried around a video set being fanned by cabana boys and slowly fed grapes one by one, she’s not being a diva, it’s just because her feet hurt, so lay off, willya?

On the set of her new video “Shake It Off” Mariah had to be carried from place to place because she couldn’t walk in the high-heeled shoes she wore for the video. Mariah said, "I can't walk in these shoes and it's not because I'm being a diva . . . Laugh all you want, my feet hurt." Her make-up artist even claimed that the shoes left her feet bloody. So why didn’t Mariah just walk around the set in the comfy slippers provided by the director? She claims that she can’t wear flat shoes because her “feet repel them." Just like Tom Cruise’s dingly-dangly repels an incoming vagina . . . oh, wait, what were we talking about? Yes, Mariah, that’s it. Doesn’t Mariah Carey have one of the top albums in the country at the moment? (Yeah, we’re not really sure how that happened either, seeing as we haven’t heard one of her songs on the radio in like eight years.) Here’s an idea: Why didn’t she use some of that money she sets aside to employ a chewing-gum caddy and buy some new f-ing shoes? There have to be a pair of shoes out there that won’t leaves Mariah’s poor tootsies looking like they just survived a run-in with Russell Crowe yet won’t compromise the artistic integrity of her life’s work. Cause you know the typical reaction to a Mariah Carey video is, "I wish she'd get those damn hooters outta the way, I can't see her shoes!"

Mariah and her divas at MrSkin.com.